In the wake of the Gold Coast Epiphany

The Gold Coast Epiphany set me off down a path of self-discovery, self-reconciliation and self-growth.

I had to forgive myself for what I allowed to happen to me and I had to somehow find my way back to what I used to be. I didn't know exactly how to do that. It turns out I didn't have to.

I tell all my girlfriends what I learnt. One of my most valuable lessons in the few months after my break up is that you need to "fake it until you make it". So that's what I did. I didn't even realise I was doing it at the time but my constant partying, dinners out with the people who used to love me and think I was incredible, dalliances with boys and what will become the very famous "pash'n'dash" gradually built me into what I was to become.

I hate to admit it, but I can almost completely attribute the re-build in confidence to my experiences with boys on the single scene.

I had never experienced that before! I was in relationships throughout highschool and beyond. Which means you miss those character building, formative dating moments. The clubs, the chat ups, the discerning the douchebags from the nice guys (and your imminent taste in men which often makes this identification IMPOSSIBLE), boys chasing you, dating you, kissing you, attempting to.... ; )

All of those things start to make you realise that you ARE a worthwhile human being, you ARE attractive to the opposite sex and you DO have not just looks but a total package of worthy attributes to offer the opposite sex.

The difference between me and many single girls? Despite never having spent any time single, I was distinctly aware of the fact that there was no direct correlation between the way boys were treating me and my self-worth.

Many boys are after one thing in the single scene. And they will say and do practically anything to get it. You would be severely disillusioned if your deductions about life, love and the mating game arose from experiences with those guys. I had an innate ability to somehow gain confidence from these experiences without having to believe every word they said...and so the "ultimate single girl was born"...

xxx